Unshackled

Compassion without restriction. De-sensitizing desensitization. Liberating with choices. Renouncing with dignity. Applauding with respect.

Tuesday, August 22, 2006

Language..

This past weekend, someone I know claimed that I'm very political about my jokes. Previously, in response to something I said, he stated:

'You're gay!'

I told him how I found his response to be very discriminating. In response mentioned how he thought I didn't know how to appreciate jokes and that 'it's just a joke, relax and just laugh!'

I still couldn't find the humour to laugh.

Don't get me wrong, I don't practice homosexuality neither do I promote nor condone it. I honestly could not find the humour. The feminist in me was scared.

A while ago, another friend - while talking about abused women continuing to remain in abusive situations- stated:
'You'll get hurt only if you let other's hurt you'.

I found that offensive. I explained to her that her language suggests that the blame is on the victim as opposed to the perpetrator.

Sometimes we say things that we don't mean. Sometimes we say things which have an impact on another level - perhaps not immediately, but foresee-ably.

The language that we've been brought up with is, more often than not, very discriminating and demeaning. Even shakespeare, sometimes described negative situations with the term 'black'. Linguists praise it as imagery.

Neither of the two people I mentioned above have a history of violence. But both of them, without realizing, make it a little more possible for anyone out there to commit an act of violence.

The above statements are so predictable. It's often stated feminists have no sense of humour and always mantain an aura/atmosphere of rigid political correctness. The first person nailed the hammer on the head by calling me political. Alot of people might think, so what's the big deal?

The above two statements sound harmless to an open mind. But as the saying goes, "it's good to have an open mind, but it's not good to have a mind so open that your brain falls out".

Language is a subconcious power battle we play within our minds. Somehow, somewhere, someone. In our own struggles we undermine the victory of others. It's a domino effect. It's like the Displacement Theory. We may say something, meaning something else, which in turn would effect someone else in a different form. Confused? Think Uncle Tarek F! In his struggles to "liberalise" and protect the muslim women of Canada, he let out many skeletons from the Muslim closet during the Shariah law debate. The statements he made, may have been uttered with positive intentions but those very words have harmed alot of others. My intention is not to defame him here, but to examplify how an attempt to liberalise muslim women may have caused the oppression of practicing women looking for a religious divorce. Moreover, the muslims who were already struggling to clean and alleviate isolation caused by stereotypes, now had another basketfull of dirtier laundry waiting to be washed out. Uncle T's words changed mass public opinion about muslims and allowed violence against practicing women to be justified. On a greater scale, Uncle T's words allowed for the violence against muslims worldwide to be justified.

That's what language does. Combined with action, it has the power of manipulation and deception. Combined with justification, it can hurt.

That also connects alot to what the study of the psyche (psychology) is all about. Though psychology helps us understand many other things, in a social context, I believe it also helps us analyze how human behavior is impacted in different social circumstances. It's all about making connections. It's about connecting our minds compassionately for the overall betterment of society. It's about connecting our minds to where agony lies. It's also about connecting our minds to where problems root - in this case, language!

Language, I believe is one of those slip ups of time, power and class. It's that part of the system that keeps failing someone, somewhere. No matter how positively it might be impacting someone, someone else out there is being affected negatively. Because, you see, regardless of how poignant we may be, our words can not speak the language of every situation across the globe. However, we can control the damage. By removing bias, race, class and colour from it.

Try it and you'll see the difference in how you'll view famous classical english writers!

ps. I thought this might be a fun activity to do:

How many statements can you recall from the last 48 hours that were negative or demeaning? None? Look carefully into the next 48 hours, you'll be surprised!

Saturday, August 19, 2006

A woman is rewarded for the crap she put up with her MIL!